


five times phil missed dan the most

by danthrusts



Series: 5 times dan/phil missed each other the most [2]
Category: Phandom, Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Food, M/M, PDA, Sad Ending, Swearing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-02
Updated: 2016-04-02
Packaged: 2018-05-30 20:02:17
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,279
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6438313
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/danthrusts/pseuds/danthrusts
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>five times phil missed dan the most, the one time he didn't</p>
            </blockquote>





	five times phil missed dan the most

**Author's Note:**

> originally posted on danthrusts.tumblr.com

1\. the day after dan left

After the incredible time Phil had just spent with Dan in Manchester he wasn’t sure if he was ready for him to leave yet. Alas, he had to, so Phil took him to the train station and gave him his goodbyes.

Phil came home from the station to find a messy unmade bed where he and Dan had just slept a few hours before, and the dirty dishes in the sink from their attempt at pancakes in that morning. Phil sighed.

His heart yearned for Dan to be back with him. He wanted to be back in his room, tackling him in hugs and kisses as they filmed Phil is Not On Fire (which would unknowingly become a tradition). He wanted it to be the night before when he was holding Dan in his lap, telling him how pretty he was as he drifted to sleep. He wanted to replay the events of Dan’s stay.

2\. the valentine’s day

Unfortunately the duo couldn’t be together on Valentine’s Day as they loosely planned. Phil was upset about that – they both were. He hadn’t seen Dan in what felt like forever and Valentine’s Day was supposed to be their day. Dan was his Valentine. Dan would argue and say it’s overrated, but Phil knew he was sad they couldn’t be together that day too.

Phil thought about what he could have done for the younger boy if they were with each other. He would take him out to dinner, they would cuddle, and they would watch a movie. He craved the warmth of Dan’s body to be curled up next to him as they watched a cheesy romantic comedy (or maybe Buffy the Vampire Slayer) and ate popcorn.

Phil closed his eyes and leaned back on his bed, letting the events of his perfect Valentine’s Day play through his head. He craved Dan’s presence.

3\. the hospital

After a bit of tummy rumbling and pills that caused explosive bloody diarrhea and death Phil took Dan to A&E to discover what could be wrong with him. As it turned out, it was a good thing he did because they diagnosed him with appendicitis. They gave him an I.V. and rushed the boy into surgery.

Phil sat in the waiting room of the hospital, nervously checking Twitter as his boyfriend was being poked and prodded with various sharp objects. The doctors told him the surgery wouldn’t be long, but after surgery unless he was immediate family, he couldn’t go see Dan. Phil decided to wait anyway, frequently checking in with the nurses and doctors around him. They told him he was resting and to go home, and that he could see his friend tomorrow when he woke up again.

After many hours of Dan not waking up, Phil went home and slept – or tried to sleep. The absence of Dan’s body made it hard for him to adjust and get comfortable. He was so used to Dan being there that he couldn’t get to sleep without his presence. He rolled around the empty bed for what seemed like years before finally getting to sleep.

When he woke up, he went straight to the hospital to see Dan. He forgot breakfast, but he didn’t care. He needed to be sure Dan was awake and recovering well. It was just appendicitis surgery, but he was still worried. How could he not?

They let him in to see Dan when he arrived. He was awake, in pain, but awake. “Good morning.” Phil smiled. Dan gave him a tired weak half smile back. “How are you feeling?”

“Literally everything hurts.” he answered truthfully and winced as he tried to shift his body toward Phil. “But at least the food is good.”

“Is it really?”

Dan laughed, but winced as he shook. “No, not at all. It tastes like blood and shit mixed together.”

Phil wrinkled his nose in disgust. “I guess I will just have to sneak you food.”

“I guess you will.”

And so Phil did. He brought Dan McDonalds the next day. He would have snuck it in the day before, but he was sure Dan wouldn’t have eaten it as the doctors just gave him loads of morphine.

“Shh, don’t tell.” he whispered to Dan as he pulled a McDonalds bag from the inside of his coat.

“You’re actually the best boyfriend ever.” Dan beamed.

4\. the trip to florida

The yearly Florida holiday with Phil’s family was always a good time to unwind, relax, and spend some quality family time, but Phil couldn’t bring himself to enjoy it as much as he did the last time they went.

The longing for Dan began when Phil said something presumed as funny, to which Phil’s parents, Martyn, and Cornelia all burst into fits of laughter. In the giggles of his family members, Phil noticed something was missing. It was Dan’s laugh along his own.

For so long, Dan’s laugh had been part of Phil’s. When Phil laughed, Dan laughed, and vice-versa. Now apart, Phil couldn’t help but notice the absence of the younger boy’s laugh.

He yearned for Dan to be there with him; they could appreciate the beautiful scenery that was Florida. He could run his fingers through Dan’s curls as they snuggled together on the beach and listened to the waves as they rushed in over the sand. They could watch the beautiful sun as it set across the ocean.

5\. the day after dan left (for good)

How could Dan say those things? After three years, how could those words have slipped off his tongue like they were nothing? It was as if all the time they spent together meant nothing.

The words rang in Phil’s ears. I never even loved you. It was a lie! It was all a fucking lie.

He didn’t believe it. There was absolutely no way it could be true. Because when Dan was underneath him in the dead of the night, calling out his name in shrieks of pleasure, there had to be some love there, right? When they cuddled on the sofa and Phil played with Dan’s curls as he drifted to sleep, he had to be feeling something, right? There was no way that after three whole years he could have been lying.

Phil was hurt. How could he not be? The one he thought was his soulmate, the one he thought he was going to be with forever, the one who used to look at him like he was the only one who mattered just left, and he couldn’t even give a proper goodbye.

Yeah, Phil was going to get over it eventually – he had to – but for now, he sat in their his flat alone, pondering what he could have done or said to make Dan stay.

6\. the one time he didn’t

It’s 2015 now and Phil’s career has never been better.

Phil is happy – probably happier than he’s ever been. He has his very own radio show with the BBC, a book, a few million subscribers who support him through everything he does, and people in his life whom he loves dearly. It’s hard to believe all of the things he has accomplished since 2012.

Everything that happened prior to now is through. He can’t go back, he can’t erase it, but that’s okay because he’s moved on. He has much better things to focus on now. He’s so glad it’s over.

Phil’s phone lights up and Dan’s name appears; he lets it ring until it goes to voicemail, then when the voicemail alert pops up on his screen, he deletes it.


End file.
